Critique on 2 New Tracks

[BeatSqueezer]

Hey gang! I’ve been working on composing for a more “commercial” type of sound (not literally for commercials, but could be as well, ha). I’ve also been trying to get my mixes and masters in a better place as well. I think I was going too hard on both.

Anyway, here are my latest 2 tracks I was hoping to get some feedback on in terms of potential “saleability” and production aspects. Any and all feedback is most welcomed and appreciated.

Thanks!
Todd

https://soundcloud.com/toddlove/sets/critiques02/s-KbvQ5ZzZDFa

[Michael Nickolas]

I like the guitar intro on Fun in the Sun, nice use of panning. Things seem to digress “feelwise” a bit after that. I don’t think the bass is working. Try simplifying it and syncing the bass notes up with the kick drum rhythm. The sound of the voice sample is somewhat artificial and the whistle sound takes me by surprise.

[BeatSqueezer]

Michael, thank you SO much for taking the time to not only listen but also give constructive feedback! You’re awesome! As per your suggestion I tried to simplify the main bass line (there were two bass parts but I left the other one alone for now). I tried to make the bass I changed to go more with the track and not so much against it. I feel like it blends in more and does feel perhaps a little more natural, although my ears have been accustomed to hearing the original bass that was there so it’s tough. Anyway, the revised track/bass line is track number 3 now if you care to compare.

I also added a bit more processing to the vocal although I don’t know if it’s enough or maybe it’s just always going to sound more artificial. I wasn’t sure if the whistles caught you by surprise was a good thing or a bad thing, haha. Anyway, for now I just faded them just a touch. My main concern was changing the main bass part.

Again, thanks for taking the time to help me out, it’s so nice to have a set of fresh experienced ears hear something where my own ears have probably gone numb to hearing. 🙂

Todd

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